12-19-09, 10:33 PM | #1 |
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Tiger Jokes
So Johnny is in class the day before Christmas vacation starts and late in the day the teacher says "Pop Quiz...if you get the answer right, you get to leave early."
"Who said 'One small step for man, one giant leap for mankind' ". Johnny raised his hand but Jenny blurted out "Neil Armstrong". Teacher said "that's right Jenny, you may leave". Teacher asked "who said 'I have a dream' "? Again, Johnny raised his hand but in a flash, Nancy shouted "Martin Luther King". Teacher said "that's right you can leave". Johnny is getting mad. Teacher asked "who said 'Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country'. Johnny's almost jumping out of the chair with hand raised when Sally shouts "John F. Kennedy". "Corrrect" says the teacher "you can leave". Johnny is pissed. Teacher turns away towards the blackboard and Johnny says 'Sure wish dem *****es had kept der mouths shut!" Teacher hurls around "Who said that?" Johnny jumps to his feet and shouts "Tiger Woods, can I go home now?" LOL - poor Tiger (last I heard the endorsement pool was draining and the wife was packing the YACHT to sail back to Sweden.)
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12-19-09, 10:48 PM | #2 |
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What is the difference between
an Escalade and a golf ball? Tiger can drive a golf ball a few hundred yards without hitting any trees. |
12-19-09, 11:38 PM | #3 |
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The police asked Tigers wife how many times she hit him with the golf club. She said, I don't remember how many but you can put me down for a five.
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12-19-09, 11:39 PM | #4 |
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Why did Tiger hit a tree and a fire hydrant? Because he didn't know if he should use a wood or an iron.
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12-20-09, 02:52 AM | #5 |
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Hey now, haven't you heard!? We aren't allowed to call him Tiger anymore, now he has to be referred to as Cheetah!
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12-25-09, 09:02 PM | #6 | |
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Quote:
It's not easy bein' cheesy
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12-25-09, 10:30 PM | #7 |
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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus?
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Santa stopped at three... |
12-25-09, 10:36 PM | #8 |
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I do believe like 90% of his endorsements are out the window... all but Nike it seems.
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12-25-09, 11:24 PM | #9 | |
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Quote:
Trojan oughta sign him up
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12-27-09, 02:34 PM | #10 |
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Tiger Jokes
So...I may feel bad for the guy, but I do think the jokes are kinda funny
Who has some? |
12-27-09, 04:11 PM | #11 |
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Help Tiger outrun his golf club wielding wife, video game...
http://video1.break.com/dnet/media/2...video-game.swf -Mark |
12-27-09, 06:06 PM | #12 |
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Woody, thanks. That was fun.
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12-27-09, 10:15 PM | #13 |
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12-28-09, 05:39 PM | #14 | |
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Quote:
I don't. He made his bed, as well as several others, now he's gotta lay in 'em
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12-28-09, 11:04 PM | #15 |
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Poor guy feels so deprived about bedding and marrying a Swedish supermodel that he has to go around banging skanky porn stars.
Yeah, that 500 mil in his bank account is probably a heavy burden, as is the undying admiration of every non-racist on the planet. When is this sad sack gonna catch a break?
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12-29-09, 02:33 PM | #16 | |
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Quote:
That heavy burden is gonna be a whole lot lighter when it's all said and done
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